Adult Bullying and Bullying in the work place.

In my life I have had two incidents where I have been bullied by my boss. The first when I was an 18 year old junior receptionist and then later in my late twenties. I came across another one.

In both instances there was one thing that was the same. The boss liked to use the power of their position to bully their employee - me. The first case when I was 18 I went to the owner of the car sales yard where I was working to report that my immediate supervisor was bullying me and I was getting the blame for something he did and he was threatening to take money from my wages to pay for the incident. Basically he had broken the cash register before I even arrived at work this particular day then told me to fix it. When I couldn't work out what was wrong I called the store to get someone to come out and repair it. It had run out of paper and was not broken. But he'd been using it and I wasn't even there when it stopped working and being 18 I had not idea what was wrong with it due to inexperience. It was after all my first fulltime job. So for him to threaten taking the service call out of my wages when really he should have tried to fix it when he was using it when it stopped working instead of passing it onto me when I started work. He had always been a very bossy and dominating person and treated me the junior as if I was dirt where he was as nice as pie to the other secretary who was in her 30's at the time. He just used his power over me and my age and inexperience against me.

Anyway I reported this to the owner thinking that he would talk to my supervisor about the situation so my wages wouldn't get docked. And basically the owner turned around and told me that he was the accountant (meaning my supervisor) and I was a junior receptionist and he was not prepared to say anything about it and if I wanted to leave I could. I was devastated! So I did I quit.

Anyway. I had another incident 10 years later with another boss who told me that I would never get anywhere in the company as I didn't have a college degree. And he always shut the door to criticise me whenever he could without anyone hearing. It was always a personal attack I never once got in trouble for something to do with my work performance. It was always I was too loud or some other personal character assassination. On my performance reviews there was never any criticism just praise at how well I did my job. I ended up leaving one day when he pushed me too far. I'd been back at work after Maternity leave for about six months and decided that I'd rather be home with my baby then putting up with his crap.

Anyway after these two incidents I have come to realise that these two men just got a kick out of criticising someone who was in lower position then themselves. And in order to make them feel powerful in their managerial position they had to be-little other people. It's worth mentioning that everybody who was in the department before this Manager got the job, ended up leaving and moving to another job or out of town to get away from him. It became apparent that anyone with more knowledge in the job then him I had ten years experience and had sat exams yet he got the Managerial position just because he had a college degree and managerial experience it didn't matter that he had no experience in Insurance claims what so ever. Anyway anyone with more knowledge then him made him feel threaten because we knew more then him. So therefore he slowly made the work environment uncomfortable for those people so they would leave and he could put newer less experienced people on so that he could train them his way. I was one of the last to leave. Keep in mind I had worked for this company for 10 years and had had many different bosses in the different sections that I worked in and had never had a problem with any other bosses in this company.

Any way back to the bullying. The reason I told you about these two incidents is because these bosses where bullys. No different to school yard bullies. Just older and unfortunately in a higher position which makes it very difficult.

My only suggestion for this situation is. If you are being bullied by your boss - leave and get a different job. Your life will be alot happier and you'll gain more experience. And you should always work in a environment where your skills and experience are appreciated and not criticised. The prospect of being unemployed when you are in that situation is scary I know, but sometimes leaving one job opens the door to another where you gain more life experiences. Why stay in a job where you are not happy. The money is not the only thing that is important. Daily happiness when you have to spend so many hours at work is also very important.

So if you are being bullied in any form in your current employment - quit and get then get off your backside and find a new job. Don't wait for one to come to you. I have never been on unemployment in my entire life. Put the effort in and you'll be rewarded.

Oh and just so you know. It is now 11 years since I left the Insurance Company job because of the bully boss. I now own my own successful business and Manage staff!!!! What goes around comes around. Oh and my staff are treated with respect, dignity and friendship and I value their contribution and pay them accordingly.The only thing I will not tolerate is bludging on the job. Do an honest days work and you'll be rewarded is my phylosphy. My old boss left about a year after me as my section became redundant so they all lost their jobs. He had to move town to a smaller position at a country branch! What goes around comes around!!!